An Autistic Woman who was Misdiagnosed and Wrongfully Medicated for a Decade

The video features a detailed conversation with an individual discussing their experience with late autism diagnosis, misdiagnosis of bipolar disorder, medication side effects, and the importance of empathy and understanding for those on the autism spectrum.

Summary

  • The individual was misdiagnosed with bipolar disorder around age 9 or 10, leading to a decade of medication with severe side effects, which masked their autism symptoms.
  • After being correctly diagnosed with autism at 31, they discuss the relief and understanding that came with the diagnosis, as well as the struggles with social interactions and forming bonds.
  • They highlight the challenges of masking to appear neurotypical, the resulting burnout, and the importance of unmasking to accept oneself.
  • Eye contact is discussed as being overwhelming for many autistic individuals, leading to a preference for alternative methods of communication.
  • The conversation also touches upon the misconceptions about empathy in autistic individuals and the need for education on the potential risks associated with psychiatric medication.

Chapter 1

Introduction and Initial Feelings

0:00 - 28 sec

The individual expresses nervousness due to being camera shy, yet they choose to share their story to help others feel less alone.

The individual expresses nervousness due to being camera shy, yet they choose to share their story to help others feel less alone.

  • They feel a mix of excitement and anxiety about being on camera, attributing their nervousness to camera shyness.
  • Despite their apprehension, they believe in the importance of sharing personal experiences to provide support and solidarity to others.

Chapter 2

Misdiagnosis and Early Challenges

0:39 - 1 min, 22 sec

The individual recounts being misdiagnosed with bipolar disorder in childhood, which led to a decade of medication that caused more harm than good.

The individual recounts being misdiagnosed with bipolar disorder in childhood, which led to a decade of medication that caused more harm than good.

  • Misdiagnosed around 9 or 10 years old due to a lack of knowledge about autism in women at the time.
  • Suffered from severe medication side effects for ten years, which impacted cognitive abilities and socialization.

Chapter 3

Effects of Medication and Self-Comfort

2:07 - 32 sec

The individual discusses the adverse effects of being medicated for an incorrect diagnosis and how they find comfort through personal items and avoiding direct eye contact.

The individual discusses the adverse effects of being medicated for an incorrect diagnosis and how they find comfort through personal items and avoiding direct eye contact.

  • Medication caused behavioral issues and cognitive decline, affecting the individual's reading ability and processing speed.
  • They find comfort in a recently purchased plush toy and prefer to avoid direct eye contact due to sensory overload.

Chapter 4

Eye Contact and Social Interaction

2:43 - 1 min, 12 sec

The individual explains the difficulty and intensity of maintaining eye contact, preferring indirect interaction during conversations.

The individual explains the difficulty and intensity of maintaining eye contact, preferring indirect interaction during conversations.

  • Direct eye contact feels too intimate and overwhelming, making social interactions challenging.
  • They often misinterpret people's reactions and intentions, leading to anxiety and questioning of their own behavior.

Chapter 5

Confidence and Late Diagnosis

3:55 - 42 sec

The individual reflects on how their late autism diagnosis affected their self-confidence and social abilities.

The individual reflects on how their late autism diagnosis affected their self-confidence and social abilities.

  • Years of attempting to conform to societal norms have eroded their self-confidence.
  • The late diagnosis of autism provided clarity but also highlighted the impact of years spent masking their true self.

Chapter 6

Impact of Medication on Development

4:30 - 47 sec

The individual details how medication altered their cognitive development and shifted their academic abilities from advanced to average.

The individual details how medication altered their cognitive development and shifted their academic abilities from advanced to average.

  • Prior to medication, they had advanced reading levels and academic abilities, which were diminished by the effects of medication.
  • The individual feels that medication changed who they were, affecting their enjoyment of activities like reading.

Chapter 7

Reflections on Medication and Childhood

5:21 - 38 sec

The individual mourns the loss of their childhood and teenage years due to the impact of being medicated for a condition they did not have.

The individual mourns the loss of their childhood and teenage years due to the impact of being medicated for a condition they did not have.

  • They reflect on how being medicated for a decade led to the loss of significant parts of their life.
  • The conversation touches upon the toll that masking and trying to appear neurotypical take on an individual.

Chapter 8

Autism, Masking, and Social Energy

6:03 - 46 sec

The individual discusses the exhaustion that comes from masking in social settings and the relief of being in a safe space where they can be themselves.

The individual discusses the exhaustion that comes from masking in social settings and the relief of being in a safe space where they can be themselves.

  • They describe the immense relief and exhaustion they feel after social gatherings when they can finally unmask and breathe deeply.
  • Masking is explained as an act of concealing one's true autistic nature and the burnout that results from it.

Chapter 9

Exploring the Desire to Mask

6:49 - 37 sec

The individual explores why they felt compelled to mask their autism and the internal struggles that came with it.

The individual explores why they felt compelled to mask their autism and the internal struggles that came with it.

  • They probe the reasons behind their desire to appear normal, such as societal expectations and self-imposed pressure.
  • The conversation delves into the psychological impacts of masking, including anxiety and misinterpretation of social cues.

Chapter 10

Autism Misdiagnosis and Educational Impact

7:24 - 34 sec

The individual reflects on how being medicated for a misdiagnosis affected their educational performance and passion for learning.

The individual reflects on how being medicated for a misdiagnosis affected their educational performance and passion for learning.

  • They share how medication for bipolar disorder, which they did not have, led to a decline in cognitive performance and academic abilities.
  • The individual believes that the medication altered their personality and academic interests.

Chapter 11

The Autistic Experience and Eye Contact

7:58 - 1 min, 4 sec

The individual sheds light on the autistic experience of eye contact, finding it too intense and preferring other modes of communication.

The individual sheds light on the autistic experience of eye contact, finding it too intense and preferring other modes of communication.

  • They describe the discomfort and sensory overload that comes with direct eye contact, leading to a preference for looking away during conversation.
  • The discussion also covers the individual's need for clear and direct communication, as subtlety can cause anxiety.

Chapter 12

Building Confidence and Forming Bonds

9:01 - 1 min, 8 sec

The individual discusses their struggle with confidence, the impact of a late autism diagnosis, and the journey toward building social connections.

The individual discusses their struggle with confidence, the impact of a late autism diagnosis, and the journey toward building social connections.

  • They express their desire to form bonds and note the difficulty in doing so due to both autism and the effects of their past misdiagnosis.
  • The individual emphasizes the importance of directness in communication to help them navigate social interactions.

Chapter 13

Preparing for the Interview and Selective Mutism

10:09 - 1 min, 19 sec

The individual explains why they prepared a detailed script for the interview, highlighting their experience with selective mutism.

The individual explains why they prepared a detailed script for the interview, highlighting their experience with selective mutism.

  • They detail their fear of not being able to express themselves due to selective mutism, hence the need for a script.
  • The individual shares their personal struggle with selective mutism and the importance of being able to communicate effectively.

Chapter 14

Unmasking the True Self

11:29 - 1 min, 36 sec

The individual reflects on the liberating experience of unmasking their true autistic self after years of hiding behind a facade.

The individual reflects on the liberating experience of unmasking their true autistic self after years of hiding behind a facade.

  • They discuss the importance of unmasking to embrace their true identity and how it led to self-acceptance.
  • The conversation touches on the challenges of masking and the relief that comes with finding a community that understands and accepts them.

Chapter 15

The Power of Empathy and Understanding

13:05 - 1 min, 20 sec

The individual emphasizes the deep capacity for empathy in autistic individuals, contradicting common misconceptions.

The individual emphasizes the deep capacity for empathy in autistic individuals, contradicting common misconceptions.

  • They highlight the misconception that autistic people lack empathy, stating that they do feel deeply and need compassion like everyone else.
  • The individual calls for greater empathy and understanding towards those on the autism spectrum.

Chapter 16

Finding Friendship and Common Ground

14:25 - 7 min, 47 sec

The individual describes the serendipitous meeting with a friend who also has autism, leading to a strong, understanding bond.

The individual describes the serendipitous meeting with a friend who also has autism, leading to a strong, understanding bond.

  • They recount how a chance meeting with a friend who is also on the autism spectrum led to an instant connection and mutual support.
  • The conversation explores how their friendship thrives despite differing beliefs, such as one being an atheist and the other being religious.

Chapter 17

Navigating Life with Autism and Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome

22:11 - 3 min, 51 sec

The individual discusses living with both autism and Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, a connective tissue disorder, and the complexities it brings.

The individual discusses living with both autism and Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, a connective tissue disorder, and the complexities it brings.

  • They explain Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome and how it affects their body, leading to joint instability and chronic pain.
  • The individual shares the additional challenges of managing physical symptoms alongside the sensory and social aspects of autism.

Chapter 18

Concluding Thoughts on Medication and Autism

26:02 - 4 min, 42 sec

The individual concludes by sharing insights on the responsible use of psychiatric medication and the strength found in the autistic community.

The individual concludes by sharing insights on the responsible use of psychiatric medication and the strength found in the autistic community.

  • They advise caution with psychiatric medication and the importance of being informed about potential side effects and withdrawal.
  • The individual expresses the profound sense of empathy and connection within the autistic community, advocating for self-acceptance.